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28 Fucking Weird As Hell Gifts You Can Only Give Your BFF
BuzzFeedsThe holidays are about to get weird.
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A corgi butt coin purse, because you've seen how they leer at dogs on the street.
Promising review: "Great gift for any corgi lover. My college-age friend uses this for laundry quarters." —Tabitha
Get it from Amazon for $7.39.
An air freshener with your face on it, so you'll always be with them.
Get three from Firebox for $20.19 (available in five scents).
A chain necklace based on the notorious None Pizza Left Beef meme for your friend who's Very Online.
Get it from ACupcakeForYou on Etsy for $21.88 (available in seven finishes).
A unicorn candle holder that cries waxy, rainbow tears when you light its horn. Wow, that's dark.
Get it from Firebox for $26.69.
A set of cat butt magnets for pinning pictures of you on the fridge, of course.
Promising review: "These cat butt magnets are so cute!! They're small, but they look just right on my fridge. The magnets are nice and strong so they won't be slipping down when you open and close the refrigerator doors. But they do have their limitations — you could use them to hold up a grocery list, small menu page, or a favorite picture, but not much else. I bought these for decoration, not for their ability to hold things up, and they make me smile whenever I walk through the kitchen." —kg
Get them from Amazon for $13, Jet for $12.69, Walmart for $12.69, or ModCloth for $15.
A pair of smiling moon emoji pillows because you honestly can't go a day without sending those to each other.
I'm in my friend's phone as "Rebecca 🌝 'Connell."
Get one from SoftDecorMarket on Etsy for $35 (available in two colors).
A pair of disembodied legs to ash in — very serial killer–esque.
Get it from Urban Outfitters for $12.
A collection of little poop ice cubes that'll make your friend say, "Holy shit! Time to make drinks."
Get a pack of 16 from Spencer's for $4.99.
A pair of matching mermaid skeleton keychains to give as a gesture that says "you complete me."
You can pick a letter charm to put on each. Aww.
Get them from BellaAniela on Etsy for $22.24.
A picture album you can fill with all the insanely weird pictures of you two together.
You certainly have enough of them.
Get it from Amazon for $9.60.
A car sticker to give the illusion that they're Santa's official chauffeur.
You will never understand their rivalry with Rudolph.
Get it from Asos for $8.
Big Mouth
A delightful boob ring perfect for showing off.
Promising review: "I bought this ring as a gift. It arrived fast! It's adorable and subtle (for a boob ring). The gift-ee absolutely loves it." —Claire
Get it from Melopepo on Etsy for $29.40+ (available in sizes 4–13 and two finishes).
Speaking of boobs, a pair of Drake & Josh earrings.
Hug me, brotha!!!
Get them from ShopBenji on Etsy for $6.80.
A helpful pug with a long-ass tongue they'll want to use to measure everything.
Get it from Asos for $9.50.
A ray gun nose trimmer so your friend can go "pew pew" while using it.
Get it from Firebox for $17.29.
A neck strap for their wine glass, so you can get drunk together but keep hands free for high-fiving.
Promising review: "I received one of these for Christmas from my mother, so when our city decided to have a wine walk, I ordered these for my sister and daughter-in-law. We were a HIT! Everyone was asking where we got them from. It actually held a real glass and we didn't spill much." —Patrick Marilyn Ernst
Get it from Amazon for $8.98.
A pair of matching poop and toilet paper keychains because your friend isn't above some bathroom humor.
Get it from ClayCreationsForEver on Etsy for $16.20+ (available in 16 chains).
A pair of matching Step Brothers enamel pins to award to the person you just said "did we just become best friends?" to.
Get it from GoodGoodPins on Etsy for $15.30.
A Dancing With Jesus book for learning fire moves to do together on Christmas. Happy birthday, Jesus!
(You can also get one with a matching bobbling figure.)
Promising review: "He may have holes in his feet but he does NOT have any holes in his game! Watch Jesus turn water and wine into a Yahweh part-ay. I recommend this book to everyone and urge the church to amend the bible and add this gospel of funk." —Ron
Get it from Amazon for $11.17+, Barnes & Noble for $11.57, or a local bookseller through IndieBound here.
Running Press
A mermaid decision pen that your friend will insist they don't need because duh? They're already a mermaid.
Click the pen to get one of six sound pieces of advice.
Get it from Asos for $11.50, Hot Topic for $6.93, or Amazon for $11.62.
A pair of penis and vagina bars of soap so your friend can clean out their mouth after all the dirty things they text you.
Get it from THEHANDMADECHARM on Etsy for $12.
A pickle body pillow because your friendship is a really big dill.
Promising review: "My wife absolutely loves her pickle ! It was very well made and the shop owner helped me out by packing it with tissue paper since it was a Christmas gift. All I had to do was wrap the box. This is my fourth purchase from them. I would not hesitate to buy from them again." —Terrance Tor
Get it from jumbojibbles on Etsy for $96.
A gross nose pencil-sharpener presented without comment.
Promising review: "Okay, gross, I know. But as a sixth grade teacher, it's a great motivational tool. It's a favorite prize when combined with a mustache pencil. Inexpensive and fun; a great prize-box filler. Highly recommended. Note: There is nothing covering the bottom so the shavings will go all over. Not a problem — kids must use it over the bin." —Smart_Chic
Get a pack of 12 from Amazon for $4.90.
A best friend is someone you can get truly weird with.
NBC
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The reviews for this post have been edited for length and clarity.
Allison Krausman / BuzzFeed